My life just got 1.88% better

Attach a mason jar to your blender for personal size smoothie making!!

You have no idea how redunk excited I am to come across this! I spent my whole day looking for a replacement for my glass blender jar that had chipped. It was going to cost me $28 bucks to have one shipped from the manufacturer. Then I thought I could probably just buy a whole new blender for that price. Lo and behold I saw a personal size blender on Amazon for a disturbingly low price ($14.69). Trying to resist buying anymore cheap plastic crappola for my home, I restarted my glass blender jar search hoping for a better deal. And THEN I stumbled across this idea! Apparently this concept is an oldie (40-50 years old!?) but looks like it is making a comeback due to the popularity of the "Magic Bullet" type blenders out there.

 

I ran around the apartment looking to see if any of my glass jars fit my blender base. I took a TJ's tomato sauce jar out of my recycling bucket, ripped off the label, washed it out, and twisted it on, it fit, sort of, but wasn't deep enough to include the rubber gasket. I moved on to an empty instant coffee container and it fit gloriously with the gasket and all.  I gave it a test run with some water to check for leaks. Everything was A-O-K. I then proceeded to have a horror-movie-flash-vision of the glass shattering and flying all over the place and impaling everything in its path. Soo...I decided to run to my parents house and get one of their tempered glass canning jars to play it safe. I made my smoothie and drank it straight out the jar with my stainless steel straw and it was awesome! A little white trashy....but awesome! I am going to save so much time/sink space not having to clean my large blender jar and an extra glass! If you try this make sure you only fill it halfway and don't use anything hot because the steam might make it explode(not good).

Tip of the day: Smell your jeans before you buy them!

Especially if they are from Joe Fresh. Sal bought 2 pairs of jeans that became unwearable after the first wash. It definitely had a Not-so-FRESH feeling. It reeked of a metallic fishy chemical. 6-7-8 washes later and they still smelled like hell and "someone" washed them with my jeans and now they're all contaminated! Maybe it is the dye? We put the 2 pairs of toxic jeans out to pasture last night while I'm working on decontaminating the rest of the batch. I read a tip to soak them with borax and/or baking soda. After a quick online search I found that new clothes are often covered with formaldehyde to keep them from wrinkling or becoming mildewed during shipping. Oh, my friend formaldehyde. I wonder if this was the smell??

More info on chemicals on clothing: HERE

I feel like if we don't want to be poisoned we need to buy organic fabric and DIY. Which I still wonder if that fabric is sprayed with something too after manufacturing... That's it, I have to grow my own cotton in the backyard (when I get one) and spin and weave it myself! I will ask my guests to bring over their looms when they come over.

Good re-use of bubble wrap/ air cushions

Other than recycling it for other packages, it works well to keep your boot legs in shape while not in use.

Does not work well for:

Skinny Jeans
 
Unless you want to creep yourself out.

Tip of the week!

Do not consume any pastilles/candy/mints with this warning label, *especially* in a you-can-hear-a-pin-drop classroom environment. Ungodly groans from your intestines are definitely a distraction from making sure the proportions of your painting are correct. Ugh.  So I will blame my lackluster painting this week on Phenylketonurics  Phenylalanine. You heard it here first :).

Tip of the day:

Do NOT put mushed banana in your hair! I'm serious, don't do it, it won't come out! I had 2 mushy bananas that I was about to throw out and instead I decided to mush it into my hair. After I washed my hair it left the most perfect banana booger bits all over, it was so gross. I had to wash and comb it like six times *no exaggeration* before it would all come out. I lost a nice bunch of hair and it made me late for a class! I got the idea from a Dr. Oz show - he mixed avocado and banana together. So 2 things I'm guessing I did wrong ~ I didn't mix it with something oily and I didn't whip it into a paste. Ugh. My dad always calls me "banana head" when I do something he doesn't agree with, yesterday I really was one in every way.

Tip of the Day

Do not attempt to sing the high pitched song Stayin' Alive by the Bee Gees on the American Idol video game unless you:

A) are a professional singer
or
B) are a dude who just got kicked in the nuts

I think I ruptured some innocent cochleas in "singing" this song at a recent holiday party.

Tip of the Day - Don't hit any of your phalanges with a wooden mallet...it hurts...a lot.

I was trying to apply a snap to my belt late last night and I missed. I think I'm going to save up my pennies for a heavy duty snap setter and a new bionic fingertip.

Do you like my 30 sec. high-quality illustration :) ?

Tip of the Day - Don't cry over fries or the lack thereof

This weekend Sal and I went to see a comedy show that we were really excited about (Family Guy's Seth MacFarlane and Alex Borstein). We got to Manhattan and found a spot right away so we were feeling great! Then when we get to the club we see a massive line outside(it's freezing out) but I notice a sign to pick up the will-call tickets inside. Ok, so we get our tickets and the lady is like, "you can check your coat and wait right here". So we're thinking, "Score, we don't have to wait outside with all those suckers!" After we wait a half hour inside we see the frozen suckers coming in. I ask the bouncer where we should wait to come in for the next show. He moves the velvet rope and places us at the front of the line. [everyone gives us dirty looks and snickers] Now everyone is seated inside the theater and they make the announcement that everyone has to buy 2 items from the menu or else they won't get an exit card. Which is basically a hostage situation, but this sort of thing is standard in comedy clubs. So I make my 2 selections- a beverage and some fries. Seems simple enough. I'm happy. So the show is half way finished and my fries haven't arrived yet, every 2 minutes I'm waggling my head around to look for the waiter but no waiter in sight. I finally call him over and he is like "sorry about that, I'll get them right now". 15 minutes later no fries in sight. Now I have fears of being held captive in a comedy club for not getting my second item. Soooooo.... this basically ruined the whole potentially awesome experience wondering about these stupid non-existent fries. The show is over and my fries are a no-show. The waiter says the kitchen is closing, do you want me to rush them out to you? Um, NOOOOOOOOOO!

Still with me? Okay, good!

So we exit the club and we go around the corner to where happens to be one of my favorite burger places. We go inside and order some burgers and FRIES. Some French dude customer in a hot pink wig was dancing around in there. I was a happy girl. Throughly satisfied we leave to go get the car. We get to where we parked the car and there seems to be a large gap in the street where cars once were. Hmmm...let's check the sign..NO STANDING ANYTIME. Frickin' great, our car was TOWED. After our minds boggled a few minutes trying to figure out who to call when your car gets towed we settled on 311. We hailed a cab to the pound, filled out a few papers and waited with all the other non-sign readers. We get called first. The lady next to me was like, "why did you guys get called first, I was here waiting" I responded, "I don't know". Then the lovely lady says, "F*** you both" and proceeds to say some derogatory comments about me in Spanish to the person she was talking to on the phone(loudly). Very nice.

3 am and a $300 fine later we were home sweet home.


The moral of this story kids is don't get upset over non-existent french fries it could always get/be worse.

The end.